Top 10 Issues Impacting Teenagers/Adolescents

I was pushed into writing the ' Top ten problems teenagers face' after I attended a school program, where I had the opportunity to interact with other parents of teenagers. The normal flow of conversation was in the form of complaints about raising teenagers. I could see that each parent was only adding one more item to the list of complaints. I searched the net - the result wasn’t much different... it was mostly about how to… get your teen to clean their rooms, handle behavior that is rebellious or aggressive, problematic teens,defiant teenagers, out of control teenagers, make them more responsible etc… This got me thinking, and I concluded that what we need today is to look at the problem in a different light..

Kids go where there is excitement. They stay where there is love - Zig Ziglar

The teenage years, most people agree, can be one of the hardest times in a person's life. Many teens feel misunderstood. They may struggle from depression or social pressures, and they may act out in response to these issues. The issues that teens face vary, but most teens seem to act out in similar ways. The following ten issues are perhaps the most common problems that teens face today.  

Problems that Teenagers Face Today

1. Teenagers and Body image

At the very outset they are struggling to come to terms with their body image. The cherubic appearance of childhood gone, they are looking at strangers in the mirror, gawky, disproportionate limbs, facial features, facial hair and acne to mention a few. They don’t know what to do with their hands and legs and are often termed ‘fidgety’

2. Search for Identity - the troubled teenager

I see teenagers as those struggling to find a place in society, be recognized by their peers and be accepted for what they are. This is the most important task of their lives at this juncture and they are faced with a lot of anxiety and insecurity as they work around this. Looking at the world around, the values are passé- this teen sticks around like a sore thumb because he is not like the rest of his peers - aggressive, pushy, vulgar, defiant and lack moral values, to name a few. His friends don’t accept him though they know that when they are in trouble they can find help here. He dares to be a loner because of his choice.

All around him, the media is not so subtly preaching that it is okay to do anything that makes you feel good. You are cool only if you have ‘things’ is what is shouted from housetops. The shows on television for this age group say all is fair in teenage - be it bullying, premarital sex, aggressive / violent behaviour, breaking rules. What is the teenager learning? What is a teen to choose? Who is to blame? Is it their fault if they become are confused teenagers , defiant teenagers or out of control teenagers?

3. Internet & Gaming Addiction

Younger generations, unlike their parents' generations, often socialize, hang out, and communicate online, rather than in person. They prefer to text rather than talk on the phone, and often prefer to socialize on Twitter or Facebook rather than in the local bar, on the street or at the town square.The digital divide: The younger generation has been referred to as being one of "Digital Natives" while the older generation has been referred to as one of "Digital Immigrants."

Teenage stress increases with school work and as they move higher, a number of projects to be done, tests to cope up with, professional choices to be focused on, drama, literary forums, sport and other extra curricular activities from the school front add to the pressure. On the social front, a new and tantalizing horizon opens up- dating, partying, hanging out with friends, vying for attention with the distraction of the media, sports, music, internet relationships etc. The teenager is under much duress to schedule time, prioritize work and achieve goals. Effective learning skills could be of great help to these teenagers. (Know more about our workshop on akshara.seth@hrpowerhouse.in)

4. High parental expectation 

Parenting teenagers is like walking on thin ice. Parents need to strike the right balance. Often times parents live their dream through their children this is when the pressure builds. Expecting the teenager to excel in academics, get good grades, be the child of their expectations – well behaved, responsible for themselves and sometimes for their younger siblings and bring in accolades from extra curricular activities - is in itself enough pressure.

5. Added to this is peer pressure. Teens, to be accepted among peers, feel the need to become more popular through other channels like music, sport and if need be by bulling and getting into school gangs… and are often under great stress to become acceptable and popular. Amid such hectic activity, the seeds of restlessness, anxiety, fear of failure, unbearable stress is all planted. The most immature and easy way out could lead them to other problem areas like formation of unacceptable habits, teenage depression, substance abuse, getting into trouble with the law etc.

6. Social and parental pressure

Every significant other adult around the teen is attempting to mould him / her into some acceptable shape. Parents, teachers, elders in the family, social groups are all party to this. The teen is hardly ever able to do what he / she wants to do with his / her life. Even though people do not push their views down their throats, they are still under a lot of strain because of the variety of suggestions given and the fear of failure. Frequently, teens arrive at decisions which conflict with their own skills or fields of interest.

The teen is suddenly expected to act like an adult, with good social and self- help skills in areas like managing work independently, decision making, managing their finances well, being responsible, etc. Though every parent complains about filthy bedrooms, untidy shelves and cabinets, smelly socks, missing stuff, I wonder where is the time! Their inability to handle pressure make them defiant in the face of expectations, more prone to anxiety, depression etc.

7. Searching for role models - who are their heroes?

In our schools we find the biggest bully, the richest spoilt brat lording it over all, the ones who break all rules (considered daring) are the most popular.

The media glorifies the people, especially in filmdom, sports, music etc and focuses on the negative aspects of their lives. Our children are fed on a diet that television programs and internet churn out, and are imbibing the values of their heroes as they see them portrayed in the media.

As role models to their children, parents should spend time with their children doing physical activities such as swimming, playing badminton or exercising.

8. Obesity 

The children today will become the country’s future leaders. But if their lifestyles are left unchecked, the nation may end up with a generation of leaders that are not only ridden with chronic illnesses but are inactive.

Teen obesity just like child obesity is a huge problem in this country. Many teens overeat as a means of coping with emotional issues. Others are simply overweight because they have had poor eating and exercise habits since birth. Regardless of why the teen is obese, they may face teasing and a lower quality of life as a result. Intervening with these teens is tricky, and if done incorrectly, the intervention may simply encourage the teen to eat more. 

9. Bullying Online & At School 

Bullying is an ongoing pattern of harassment and abuse. It can be done directly by physical or verbal attacks or indirectly by exclusion, spreading rumors, etc. Cyberbullying is a growing problem among Middle and High School aged students. While it also occurs among College-aged students, for the most part young people have matured past cyberbullying at that point. If a child feels he or she is being cyberbullied, you must accept it as cyberbullying. In all cases of bullying, it is up to the victim, not the adult, to determine whether bullying is taking place. In many cases, intense bullying has even lead to suicide by the victim. 

1 in 5 kids report being bullied or bullying. Every 7 minutes, a child is bullied in the school setting.While most teachers believe they always intervene in face-to-face bullying, only 25% of students report they have received teachers' help when they needed it.

10. Violence At Home

One of the main reasons that children become violent is because they are exposed to violence in their own homes, whether it is directed towards them or towards others. Violence at home can be of a physical nature, or it can be expressed verbally or through neglect and abandonment. Abusive homes and violent neighborhoods are stronger predictors of adult violent behavior than violence in the media. Most abusive parents were physically or sexually abused as children.

The home and the neighborhood have an immense influence on children. Violent children are most likely to come from abusive homes and/or neighborhoods.

If your teen has experienced any of the above issues, they are not alone. It is not a reflection on your parenting abilities, but it is important to seek help for your teen. At HR Power House we are  empowering adolescents. To know more about us drop a comment below.